2-15-94
Well, I'm off. Left last night from San Diego with sad good-byes and a few tears. I've spent the day in Miami, met about 20 new people, from all over the U.S. Now, I'm lying in my hotel room with girls from Chicago, Iowa, and Wisconsin. I'm very tired, confused, and lonely. I don't regret my decisions, but right now I'm definitely teary. Leaving Seth is one of the hardest things I've ever done, probably the hardest. I've just grown so attached to him, he's such a wonderful person, and he brings out so many wonderful things in me. Everything is going to be so wonderful once it starts, but this week of orientation before is going to be hell. But underneath the tears is a positive spirit seeking adventure, I swear! I'm just waiting for that spirit to emerge,bringing me strength, I really need that strength now. I feel very alone. Maybe I'll write some letters tomorrow, that might make me fuel a little better. I'm ready for this, but I'm a realist, and I know now that once I get there, it won't be all joyous and exciting, I'm going to have hard times, and lonely times, and times where I just wished I was at home, but it will all be worth it, I've already learned so much and I haven't even reached Paraguay yet, our flight leaves tomorrow at 11:30pm. I'm scared and nervous, but I'll be fine.
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